vibrantabyss (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
vibrantabyss) wrote2008-10-05 12:31 pm
vibrantabyss) wrote2008-10-05 12:31 pm
And in this moment I am happy...
Eight years now.
Last night was the first time I haven't stayed home, turned the lights off, and wallowed in self-indulgent misery.
I motivated and went out to a social gathering, actually chatting with folk and mostly being carefree. I laughed, I drank, but with no intent to get trashed (or anything close to that). I introduced myself to some people, chatted freely, actually worked on making myself part of the social fabric. I drank more after I got home, but only one, and only because I was feeling... content. I listened to sad tunes, but did not loop them endlessly.
Today I woke up feeling, if not cheery then at least at peace. And I will go out into the world and be a part, rather than apart.
Even if just for a moment, even just to see I am better... I wish you were here.
Last night was the first time I haven't stayed home, turned the lights off, and wallowed in self-indulgent misery.
I motivated and went out to a social gathering, actually chatting with folk and mostly being carefree. I laughed, I drank, but with no intent to get trashed (or anything close to that). I introduced myself to some people, chatted freely, actually worked on making myself part of the social fabric. I drank more after I got home, but only one, and only because I was feeling... content. I listened to sad tunes, but did not loop them endlessly.
Today I woke up feeling, if not cheery then at least at peace. And I will go out into the world and be a part, rather than apart.
Even if just for a moment, even just to see I am better... I wish you were here.